Miracles Do Happen

I would like to share with you the experience I had when I went to my first NA meeting.

I told you a while back that I would tell you about my spiritual awakenings but first you had to believe........

I hope you are ready for this now.

I was in a complete state of denial. I knew that my husband was addicted to the crack but I didn't believe I was. I knew that it had a hold on me but I could stop using at any time. I had already stopped using for a few days. My husband continued to use however, I noticed that his demeanor changed toward me if I didn't have that crack pipe in my face. I was scared.

I had already been to the addictions counsellor who had given me the information I needed to make my getaway. I called Narcotics Anonymous Hotline. I spoke to a man named Gerald. I will always remember his name and soon you will understand why.

I briefly explained my situation while my husband was in the bedroom trying to sleep away the craving to get more drugs. I didn't want to be a part of it this time. I told Gerald that I was a little nervous about going to a meeting. I had tried to go a week earlier but I got scared when I saw the people standing outside waiting to go in.

I walked right by and I ended up calling my husband to pick me up. That was a big mistake because I ended up back at the house with the crack pipe in my hand. I was probably hoping that he would come to a meeting with me but he was more interested in the drugs and calling me names and getting angry because I didn't want to do it anymore.

At first it seemed like everything would work out and he would stop using. He couldn't stop on his own and I realized that I couldn't either. A week later I called Gerald for help. So as I was explaining to Gerald what had transpired in the last week he suggested I show up early and speak with the secretary. Let them know that I am knew and they would take care of me. This way I could feel comfortable about being there and if I didn't like it I could leave at any time.

I pondered what he was telling me. Originally I had hoped that he could arrange for someone to come to my house to pick me up so I didn't have to go alone and I knew that my husband would not escort me there. Gerald did not have his phone list with him that day. I decided to consider what he was telling me.

When I hung up the phone, the other line was ringing back to me so I answered it thinking that my girlfriend was still on the line. She wasn't. The line kept ringing. No answer. I hung up. A few moments later the phone rang again.

A woman named Lisa was on the phone. She was returning a call that she had missed. My phone number showed up on her cell phone. I didn't call her and yet my number showed up and she called me back! Her phone was the one that was ringing when I hung up with Gerald! How is that even possible?

I told Lisa that I didn't call her. Just as she was about to hang up I asked her if she was with NA. She said yes! She asked why I asked her that so I explained my conversation with Gerald and what had happened when I hung up the phone with him. She wasn't surprised.

I asked her why she was involved with NA and she told me that she is a recovering crack addict and has four years clean time. She was at a meeting that she chaired and I could call her anytime I wanted to talk. I will always remember Lisa and Gerald. God wanted me at that meeting that night. He had a plan for me and He knew it would take a miracle to get me there.

When I got off the phone I went into the bedroom where my husband was trying to sleep and I told him about what just happened. I was a little tearful at the time because I knew God was talking to me but my husband was freaked out by this. He seemed to have been agitated by what I had just told him so I didn't ask him if he wanted to come. I went by myself.

It was an experience I will remember for the rest of my life. God was working in my life before I even knew about the 12 Steps. I met some people at that meeting. They looked normal to me. There were some people who were celebrating clean time birthdays that night. I heard some people share their stories that seemed similar to mine.

That is what recovery is about. A fellowship of men and women getting together to share their strength, hope and courage to find a new and better way of life without the use of drugs or alcohol. We keep each other focused on recovery by listening to what works. And it does work. If you have faith. Faith means simply to believe. If you believe then you have hope. If you give up hope then you give up the right to live.

My first NA meeting was May 22, 2007. Ever since that day I have been given a second chance at life. Give yourself another chance. Come and let your light shine. All you have to do is try. You will see it work, but only if you are there to see it.

I have more miracles to tell you about but first I want you to keep believing.